I GOT A FEELING

There wasn’t any particular reason; there was NO reason but... after a long time a song I heard for the first time brought tears to my eyes. I dint even understand the lyrics but the music, the sound, the rhythm was so beautiful that I felt overwhelmed. I can only describe it as the power of music ( it could also be the effect of Bose speakers).

Why is it that when you want to control your laughter, all you can remember is more funny moments and incidents that make it so difficult to control laughter. On the other hand, when you are sad those funny moments are overpowered by the tears. Sad thoughts just filled my head. How much time and effort I took to put that Kajal and now it’s all smudged thanks to the wet eyes. Damn!

Why was I feeling like that? It all started with the horrible news of Candy’s death. Candy was a wonderful dog living in Nerul. Candy was adorable, may you rest in peace. I can’t imagine life without Buddy (my brother) and my nieces and nephews: Hippie, Bouncer, Mojo, Kinky, Nishi, Droopy, Tiny and Cuddly. Those innocent eyes, the pure love (especially when there is food in your hand) and the wagging tails, I love them.

XIC, how could I not mention you? You have given me wonderful friends whom I adore very much. They have accepted me for who I am or so I think: A little bossy, always being mean, continuously nagging and cribbing, saying whatever I think and feel like (you could call it verbal diarrhoea) , keeping people awake because I don’t feel sleepy, bugging people-- just to name a few of my idiosyncrasies. Well my biggest problem in the world is I do things for ‘fun’. I never mean to upset or harm anyone because I feel worst bout it. I hate unpleasantness and fighting and argueing (pronounced: Orgue-ing: In British Accent).

I happened to go through facebook when I came across my friends parents 25th anniversary photographs. It was on the same day as my mommy and daddy's. I felt flustered. Both my sister and I were stuck in Mumbai on their special day and we couldn’t do anything. Wish Mumbai and Kolkata was walking distance or even an hour away (that is quite nearby according to Mumbai’s standard of distance). Love has been happening for my parents like crazy, I feel like just hugging them and not leaving them.

My sister hasn’t visited home in 6 months.She is leaving in few hours :(. Lucky her. Even though I did go to surprise my parents once in 6 months I am all restless, can’t wait to go home. Friends, Betsy (my car), home, my room, the pampering, the Christmas with my family (the 4 of us + Buddy) with wine and cake...oh why is time passing so slowly? There is a void , there is a ‘feeling’ of something is missing or in my mother’s words “Feeling sorry for yourself”. All I want to feel right now is loved.

That amazing song got over and then there was ‘Sheela ki jawaani’... those sad thoughts just vanished. Immediately I was out of control once again. I couldn’t stop dancing. It was just another ‘feeling’. A feeling of shaking my hips, booty and the shimmy. The pursuit of happiness that not too many days left for home. I am so lucky to have the most awesomest and coolest local guardians Mish and Gev who definitely bring happiness to me and makes my stay in this Mumbai worthwhile.

It’s amazing how we human beings are so full of emotions and confused most of the times. I ‘feel’ jealous of OUR puppies. They sleep while we stay up long nights doing our assignments. They don’t have to earn money for a living. Food is free. Life is so good for them.

My teacher's always said I am a 'happy child' but every dog has its days. ;)

"Well does life get any better, more yesterday than today

  How I thought the sun would shine tomorrow

  But it rained..."